i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
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