If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
they call him Oral-B. enough said
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
Randomize
