I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
Randomize
