dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
Randomize
