none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
Randomize
