ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
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