last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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