It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
Randomize
