Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She swung at the pinata with crutches
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
I'm, like, this 🤏🏼 close to buying crocs
And you're also 🤏🏼 to never putting your dick inside me again
Randomize