pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize
