Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
WHO CARES HE GIVES YOU TOE CURLING ORGASMS AND SAYS YOU HAVE KISSABLE SKIN AND RUNWAY MODEL HAIR....WHILE INTOXICATED WITH HIS BEST FRIEND. AND THEN HE SENDS YOU CUTE SELFIES OF THEM!!!!!!! WTF MORE DO YOU WANT FROM LIFE!!! DIE HAPPY ALREADY LADY!!!
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
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