I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize
