What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
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