How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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