Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
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