I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
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