ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Randomize
