We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
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