Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
Randomize
