If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
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