Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
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It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
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