my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Randomize
