i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
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