You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Randomize
