Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
My ass is underappreciated
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