Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
Randomize
