At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
Randomize
