after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
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