That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
Randomize
