So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
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sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
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I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
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