If that was your dad, he is hot
She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
Randomize
