The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
Randomize