TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
Randomize
