glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got 87 likes on my changed relationship status. It's official. I'm way more fucking awesome single.
They're mostly guys
Early bird gets the worm.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
Randomize