Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
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