We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
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