I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
what is it with giant penises always finding me
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
Randomize
