Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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