So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
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