If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
you have to choose: penises or morals?
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
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