There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
Randomize