He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
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