return my video game
I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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