She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
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