At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
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