i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
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