I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
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