ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
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