well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Randomize
