I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize