I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
Randomize
