If Billy Mays did an infomercial on your dick, it still wouldn't get you laid.
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
I understand Curling. That high.
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize