I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
Randomize
